JFG Nation, hey.
*pause*
You understand, I at all times questioned how I’d start my first put up in over a yr, and I assume that’s the reply: “Hello there.” How anti-climatic.
Nonetheless sure, HI. Hello there, JFG Nation. It has been an extended. Extended. Extended. Extended. Time. A very very very long time since I’ve written a put up. A very very very long time since I’ve edited {{a photograph}}. A very very very long time since I actually engaged in social media. My IG sport is methodology down, and I can’t take into accout after I truly even checked out this internet web page. It’s been some time, to say the least. Modifying the images beneath, I felt like a novice. These items was as quickly as second nature to me. This time spherical? It took me endlessly to recollect the password to this site. Not kidding.
Over the sooner yr, I thought-about what I might say on this put up. The extended rambling apology for being away for attributable to this reality extended. The philosophical ideas about working a weblog, meals, sports activities actions actions, parenting, and life itself. The majestic methodology I’d re-enter the realm of meals writing, asserting my triumphant return!
There’s just one draw again: this ISN’T my triumphant return.
No; please think about this a one-off – a drop of rain that makes you look for, questioning the place that purchased proper right here from. For mannequin new readers (if any, at this diploma), I used to run this internet web page meticulously for years and years and years. Research this for a quick historic earlier. Every single day, a mannequin new snack or meals or one issue. Every single day, a random thought, a random rant. I used to be a part of a podcast, then I wasn’t; I might pattern new meals at consuming places and company factories, then I didn’t; I used to go the Summer season season Fancy Meals Present, then I…no, I nonetheless went to that this yr. It was scrumptious.
So what occurred? Accurately, JFBaby occurred. And now the one FOMO I get is baby-related. I used to take footage of meals in every single place I went. Now I’ve literal THOUSANDS of child snapshots. It occurred, all individuals. I used to be assimilated.
So sure, perhaps I’ll drop off the face of the Earth as quickly as further after this put up. Possibly I’ll come as soon as extra in just a few months. Possibly I’ll HEY PUT DOWN THAT BOTTLE! *snaps fingers* HEY! HEY! PUT IT DOWN…..DON’T THROW IT. DON*. Sigh. I’ll be appropriate as soon as extra.
Correct now’s junk meals: Most Stuf Oreo!!
So as soon as extra in June, I IG-ed/Tweet-ed this:
The reality is, that random packaging promo wasn’t the one problem I had. I furthermore had THE COOKIE ITSELF:
Yep, Santa was good to me, and an nameless present let me attempt one among these prototypes as soon as extra in June. Wait, this angle doesn’t do it justice…
Neither does this angle…
THERE we go. Nearly 4x the creme, individuals. FOUR X! THAT’S….A LOT OF CREME.
(Btw, sure, I do know – I DO NOT OWN AN IPHONE X. In one other case I’d have the ability to get this cookie picture in portrait mode, appropriate? Right. SOMEONE BUY ME AN IPHONE X.)
This picture is launched in case you’re questioning how tons creme we’re speaking about correct proper right here. The cookie sat nearly 3/4-inch thick. The creme itself took up between 5/16 and 6/16 of an inch. This was an absurd quantity of creme.
Twisting the very best off was like unscrewing a jar of creme. It nearly appeared like a mistake. A GLORIOUS SWEET MISTAKE.
This typically is a knife. This typically is a knife with the creme scraped off onto the tip. I will’ve mortared up the brick on the ground of my home with these things.
The consistency of the creme? Precisely the same are widespread Oreo creme – merely heaps extra of it. Like Double Stuff, like Mega Stuff – this merely had MORE STUF. How’d it vogue? DAMN SWEET. This isn’t rocket science, peeps – that is solely a cookie with a WHOLE LOT MORE SUGARY GOODNESS.
Did I select it? Optimistic, the best method that I hottest consuming sugar cubes straight from the sphere as soon as extra in highschool. Sometimes sugar JUST TASTES GOOD. And this cookie scratches that itch efficiently. My knowledge says these come out in January 2019. Put collectively.
Alright – that’s it. It was good to work together with you as quickly as further, JFG Nation. For everybody who left choice messages about lacking this weblog: I do too, and thanks. And to those which had been glad I used to be gone, efficiently: sucks to your assmar.
Sincerely,
The JFG